Under Arrest

Hulan smoothed down her dress and inspected her hair closely in the mirror, tidying away a few stray wisps.  She turned to her father, “Wha’ do ye think Pa?”
“Och, I think ye look lovely lass, pretty as a picture you are.”
Hulan snorted and tossed her head, “I’s no a fashion parade Imma goin’ ta, i’s an important interview.  I dinnae want ta look pretty, I want ta look smart an’ tidy!”
Thorden grinned at his daughter, “Well ye look tha’ too lassie.”
Hulan turned back to the mirror and fussed nervously with her hair.  “I do ‘ope it turns out all right.  This guild ‘as very ‘igh standards an’ I dunno that I’m gud enuf fer ‘em.”
“Not gud enough fer ‘em?!” Thordenn roared “Dinna be thinkin’ like that lassie!  Yer gud enough for any guild in Azeroth an’ dinna ye go sayin’ any different!”
Hulan caught her father’s eye in the mirror and grinned “Mebbe I shud send yesself up ta Ironforge, ye cud speak fer me an’ tell ‘em how gud I am.  Then again, mebbe ye’d frighten tha poor wee bugger ‘alf ta death an’ they’d never let me in!”
Thorden smiled sheepishly, “Ye dinna need me ta speak fer ye lassie, yer quite capable o’ doin’ that fer yesself.  I dinna like ta ‘ear ye do yesself down though, yer as gud as anyone.”
Hulan picked up her cloak and draped it over her arm and crossed the room to hug her father.  “I know Pa.  Now wish me luck, I’m away up to Ironforge ta meet yon fella.  ‘E said aboot eight o’clock an’ I’d rather be there in plenty o’ time.”
Thorden hugged Hulan hard, “Good luck to ye lassie.  I ‘ope tha fella gi’s ye a fair hearin’.”
Hulan threw the cloak around her shoulders, “Imma sure ‘e will.  Like I said, they’re a gud bunch o’ people…I’ve never ‘eard a bad word aboot any o’ them.  Now dinna fash yesself, I’ll come straight back an’ tell ye all aboot it.”

Hulan stepped outside the small house and untethered the white ram, vaulting easily onto it’s back, and set off at a brisk canter for Ironforge.  She found herself outside the gaping mouth of the mountain in no time at all and searched for a space to tie up Cloud.  She removed the cloak and stashed it in a saddle-bag, then, with a quick pat, she took her leave of the ram and entered the mighty fortress of Ironforge.  She headed briskly towards Tinker Town, pausing to cast a longing look at Bruuk’s as she crossed the Military Ward; after a brief internal struggle she shook her head and continued on her way.  Reaching her destination she stopped an looked round in confusion.  Looking for a gnome in Tinker Town was a bit like looking for a needle in a haystack!  Hulan stopped to speak to every gnome she was saw but only got baffled looks and shaken heads in response.  She looked around for somewhere to sit and wait but there were no seats so she strolled around, keeping a sharp eye out for a gnome who might be a likely candidate for her meeting.  She heard the great horn call out the eighth hour of the clock and her heart leaped; surely he wouldn’t be long now.  For some time Hulan continued to approach every male gnome that entered Tinker Town until suddenly she felt a tap on her shoulder.  She swung round, hoping to see a gnome to find herself staring into the face of an Ironforge Guard.
The guard fidgeted and, looking extremely embarassed, said in a low voice “‘Scuse me lassie, cud ye come wi’ me please to tha Guardroom?”
“Tha Guardroom?  Whatever fer?!  I ‘ave an extremely important meetin’ an’ I dinnae want ta miss tha wee fella. I’m sorry but I dinna ‘ave time ta come and chat wi’ ye…he’s already late an’ hopefully will be ‘ere any moment now.”
The Guard shifted uneasily, “Now lassie, imma tryin’ ta tell ye nicely that yer under arrest, ’tis nae a wee chat I need.”
Hulan gaped at him, open-mouthed. “Under arrest!” she exclaimed, “What on earth am I under arest fer?!”
The guard flushed deep crimson to the roots of his hair and, refusing to meet her eye, muttered something unintelligible.  Hulan scowled at him, “There nae use tellin’ yer feet mister…I did nae unnerstan’ a word o’ that.”
The Guard lifted his head slightly and muttered again.  Hulan’s scowl deepened and she barked at him, “I cannae unnerstan’ a word!  Sol…wha’ was that word?  I never ‘eard o’ it before.”
The Guard hissed a word at her in a sharp whisper.
“Solsticin’?  Wha’s that then?  I’ve done nuthin’ wrong.  All I’m doin’ is waitin’ ta meet someone.” Hulan glared at the Guard, bristling with indignation.
“Shhh, shut yer yap lass, not so loud.  I’s tha kind o’ meetin’ yer doin’ tha’ folk around ‘ere ‘ave complained aboot.”
Hulan look baffled.  “Tha’ word ye said, wha’ does it mean?  Why wud folk complain?”
The guard groaned and momentarily buried his face in his hands.
“Look lassie, jes’ come wi’ me to tha Guard room an’ we’ll get it all sorted oot…I’m sure there’s some innocent esplanation.”
“But I canne go’ wi’ ye,” Hulan protested, “Imma supposed ta be meetin’ someone at eight.”
“Well, i’s half after eight now so I wud nae be frettin’ aboot it, ye’ve more important things ta worry aboot now”
Hulan’s face fell and then she shrugged in resignation.  “All right then mester, I’ll come wi’ ye to tha Guard room an’ ye can tell me wha’s goin’ on.”

Hulan followed the guard back into the Military Ward and they entered the Guard Room.  A few moments later startled passersby were dumbfounded to hear an indignant yell closely followed by a loud thump and a howl of pain.  An instant later a member of the Ironforge Guard flew out of the door showered by a barrage of helmets, boots and assorted military paraphenalia, all hurled by an angry female dwarf who stood in the doorway absolutely incandescent with rage.
“Ye filthy bugger!”, she shouted at him. “Ye should wash yer mouth oot wi’ carbolic soap ta be sayin’ such things to a lass!  Solsticin’ Gnomes ye call it? Tha’s jes’, jes’…..”, Hulan struggles to find the right word. “jes’ WRONG!  There I am jes’ mindin’ me own business and ye come along an’ start accusin’ me o’ bein’ some sort o’ PERVERT!”
The Guard grabbed one of the helmets, which he jammed quickly onto his head, and cowered trying to avoid the missiles raining down all around him.
“Ye misunnertood me lassie,” he cried desperately “I dinna think that o’ ye but someone complained cos they saw ye talkin’ to all tha wee fellas.  They thought ye were…er…”
“I know fine well what they thought!  Ye just ’splained it ta me!  The very idea o’ it indeed!  And yesself…instead o’ tellin’ them nae ta be so daft and sendin’ ‘em off wi’ a flea in yer ear, ye decide that ye need ta be important an’ investigate!”  Hulan glowered fiercely at the Guard, brandishing a small mace at him.
At that moment the Sergeant of the Guard turned up and pushed his way through the crowd that had gathered and surveyed the scene that greeted him with astonishment.
“What on earth’s goin’ on ‘ere?” he demanded of the Guard huddled on the floor.
“I’ll tell ye wha’s goin’ on!” spluttered Hulan “Tha’ bugger there’s makin’ filthy accusations an’ tryin’ t’arrest me!”
“Yer Thorden Stonefist’s lass aren’t ye?”
Hulan nodded.
“Well, jes’ ye step inside a moment an’ we’ll see if we can sort this out…there’s obviously bin a misunderstandin’.”
He turned to the Guard on the floor and snapped “Frumpi, get this mess cleared up sharpish!”
As he and Hulan disappeared back inside the guard Room, the crowd began to disperse slowly, slightly disappointed that the entertainment seemed to be over.  Ten minutes later a calmer Hulan reappeared and headed for home.  Her father threw the door open as she stopped outside the small house.  “‘Ow did it go lass?”
Hulan shook her head and sighed “He did nae turn oop.  Le’s go inside an’ ‘ave a beer an’ I’ll tell ye all aboot it.”